New Job

Time for a schedule change. Just started a new job. I have worked for two days so far. It is a physical job so I need to make sure my blood sugar does not go too low.

Eating habits, sleep schedule, and insulin doses have all changed. It is not a big change but enough to mess up my entire system if I let it. So far I have had no trouble at all adjusting to the change.

I am very excited.

Holiday Eating

I know that it is a little early to think about the upcoming holiday season but it is right around the corner.

I remember in my mid teenage years (before diabetes) Thanksgiving was my favorite holiday. I was a growing boy and I loved to eat. After diabetes, holiday parties became very stressful trying to avoid an extreme high blood sugar that would ruin my entire day. There are always plenty of high carbohydrate foods during the holidays. So I began to dislike this time of year.

In recent years I have begun to like the holiday season again. The extreme high blood sugar doesn't happen. That is for a number of reasons. I do not eat the same way I did as a teenager. I do not have the insatiable appetite. I also eat smaller amounts of the high carbohydrate foods. I have a good time again.

Wrestling

In high school I was involved in wrestling. You constantly had to watch your weight. You had to monitor absolutely everything that you consumed. The season before I was diagnosed with diabetes I showed up to an all day tournament having to cut my nails, hair, had to shave my face and was 1/2 lb overweight. Had to put on as many clothes as possible go to the "hot" room and run around in circles for awhile. Then go back to the locker room and hop on the scale in the nude. I successfully completed all those tasks and was able to wrestle that day.

When I had diabetes my coach told me not to concern myself with losing weight. What ever I weighed a spot would be found for me to fill. That was a relief. 1/2 lb weight loss hours before competition was not a fun experience.

During my high school wrestling career I wrestled every weight class from 130 - 189.

Understanding

I have had a number of low blood sugar incidents, seizures, and hospital trips over the years. I had always experienced low blood sugar from the inside looking out perspective. Did not know what people around me experienced when I was having an issue.



I was in a band and another member of the band also had diabetes. We performed one night and it was a long 4 hour marathon at a local bar. Since it was local we all went home to our own beds. We got home about 3 in the morning. We had a performance the next day. It was either in the afternoon or a lengthy drive but we had to get an early start.



So the next morning I showed up at my band member's house and gave a call. (no answer) Called again. (no answer) I walked to the front door and knocked. His roommate let me in. I knocked on his bedroom door. (no answer) I opened the door. "Hey we need to get going." He looked at me, smiled, and put his hands behind his head. I thought "he is still sleeping". So I was a little more forceful with my speech. He did not really respond. He just laid there and stared at me. (a glassy eyed stare, very scary)

Then he moved his hands. I noticed that they were shaking and he twitched a couple of times. I then realized he was having a low blood sugar. I walked out of his room and went straight towards the refrigerator. I grabbed a can of root beer. Got him to drink from it and a few minutes later (seemed like forever) he became conscious.

We got something to eat and continued our journey for the day like nothing happened.

Big Events

There are many things to think about when you have diabetes and are going to an event with an extreme concentration of people.

Waiting in line at a concession stand to correct a low blood sugar - not too fun.

Jumping up from your seat to go to the bathroom and wait in line because your blood sugar is too high - not too fun.

Either scenario you are missing the event.

If it is an outdoor event and the sun is beating down on you precautions need to be made to keep from frying your medication.


A couple of days ago I was trying to figure what I wanted to write about next. The idea came to me that I would write about how to handle "big events" in particular sporting events. A few hours later my older brother came home with two tickets to todays college football game. Very cool!

I had a great time. My younger brother is an alumnus so he was there as well. My blood sugar was in balance so I had no issues. The only challenge was that it was very hot and the sun was beating down on me all day. (Got a little red) Did not have a cooling system for my insulin. I took it out of my pocket put it under my seat and made sure it was in the shade all afternoon. Stayed at optimum temperature.

Had a great time watching football and spending time with my brothers.

Are You Scared of Needles?

No choice. If you are an insulin dependant diabetic either you get over your fear quickly or you have an extremely difficult time keeping yourself healthy.

I recall as a young boy having trouble with needles but by the the time I needed to take shots everyday I was over it. It is a very small needle and just goes under the skin. Sometimes it does hurt but with practice and confidence you can reduce those incidents.

I am so used to needles now that if I get my blood drawn I will look directly at the needle and watch where it is going. No fear.

Newly Diagnosed

I remember when I was first diagnosed. Was going to high school. People looked at me differently when they heard the news. Close friends looked at me strangely only for a little while and quickly got over it. Acquaintances would always ask if I could do this or that and seemed uncomfortable around me.(Especially when food was involved)

At the time it felt extremely annoying but these people cared about my well being.

Don't notice it now. Perhaps more in tune to what people thought as a teenager. Or these "looks" were imagined.

Over the years I have learned that it is much better that somone knows about your condition than if they don't know. Even when their knowing could create some awkwardness.

Alone

Are you scared to be by yourself? Are you concerned that you might make a mistake go to sleep and not wake up?

In the past I was uncomfortable going to sleep either without people around or around people who did not understand symptoms of diabetes.

A couple of times I had so many low blood sugars in the morning that I was afraid to go to sleep. I have gotten over that scared feeling. Waking in the middle of the night sweating with my heart racing and hands shaking does make you reevaluate your insulin regimen.

Garbage Mouth

I recall when I was first being diagnosed with diabetes that after a nap/sleep I would arise and have a terrible taste in my mouth. The terrible taste would always be accompanied by a "blah" feeling.

Maybe I got used to the bad taste? Perhaps it went away?

Currently I do taste it. Is that just because I am thinking about it?

I do know that I am currently out of balance. Blood sugar high quite a bit and I have lost a little weight. (without trying)

Seizure

Yesterday I planned to reverse my sleeping schedule by staying up. I had been going to bed about 6 am and waking about 3 pm. So I decided to stay up and sleep well the next night. I had a pot of coffee and I did some organizing around the house. About noon I began to feel tired so I sat in the chair and took a nap.

After a while I got up and walked around the kitchen in a bit of a haze. I looked at the clock. It was 3:30 pm. I was sleepy but I was also in trouble. I began to feel these slight uncontrollable jerks. "Low Blood Sugar" My brother was at the house but he works nights so he was not quite ready for the next day. The last thing I remember is holding onto the banister and yelling for my older brother.

The next thing, I am on the kitchen floor and my brother is standing at my feet asking me what I'm doing on the floor. I say nothing just extend my arm so I can be lifted from the floor. It was after 4:00.

I went to my room and laid down for a minute. I felt intense nausea for a few minutes but it quickly subsided. I talked with my brother to make sense of the whole situation. There was no evidence of food being eaten "How could I come out of a seizure without help?" I ate a little bit and had the nausea come back and then quickly subside.

After some time I began to realize my injuries. First I noticed my shoulder and my calf muscle. I couldn't lift my arm and my calf felt like I had a serious cramp. Then I noticed scratches on the back of my hand. Then I noticed that I had taken a bite into my tongue. The final pain I notice was my tailbone.

I must have really hurt my shoulder. Today there is very low range of movement.

I need to figure out how to avoid these episodes. They are pretty scary.

High Speed Insulin

This is most definitely a bad habit but it can be useful in a pinch. Yesterday I was cruising down the highway at 70 MPH and realized I could use a dose of insulin. So I put the car in cruise control, grabbed my insulin pen, screwed on the cap, and dialed up what I needed all by feel. I then looked down briefly to line up the needle and the target site. I kept my eyes on the road and watched for bumps/cars and when it looked safe I stabbed myself with the needle and pushed in the plunger.

Of course the best plan of action would have been to pull over and take an insulin shot with the car parked.

I have also done this procedure with a syringe and vial.(It is a two man job.)

I do not think it is as bad as texting but taking an insulin shot would be on the list of things not to do while driving.

On The Road

When traveling I find it more difficult to control my blood sugar.(extreme highs and extreme lows) Eating different foods than you are used to.(Usually food that is not good for you) And your schedule completely turned around. I am currently three hours away from home preparing for a friends wedding. I have had to face a few challenges in regards to my diabetes.

It is going to be a great day!

Shaky and Fuzzy

The other day I started the morning out a little low. It wasn't a big deal but I stayed on the low side most of the day. After dinner I was going to bring my weight bench into the house. It had been sitting outside rusting all summer. I figured it was time for me to begin a weight lifting routine. It needed to be disassembled because it does not fit through the door. Not a big deal.(four bolts.) I was starting to feel a little strange as I was studying what I needed to do. I looked into the fridge but I could not recognize anything in there and then I could not understand why I was looking anyway. So then I went to the garage to gather the tools that were needed. Things became fuzzy. Then my dad came into the garage and asked me some questions and I just kept answering "What?". I then realized I needed some help. So I asked him to bring me a regular pop. He came back and I took a few sips and began to feel better. I had a couple of "shakes"(small jerks) as I was drinking the pop. Obviously I overdosed on insulin during my dinner time meal.

The weight bench did not make it into the house that day.

It is in the house now. The preparations for working out have been made just need to start the program.

Morning Highs

High blood sugar early in the morning is a real pain in the butt. You are having this weird dream where urination is the main subject and you realize you had better wake before you wet the bed. Wake up do your thing and fall back into bed only to wake again shortly after. It is definitely cause for a very tiresome day because you do not sleep well at all.

Whoops

I did not get much sleep this past weekend and I went to a party that lasted late into the evening. When I got home I just went straight to my bed. Leaving my insulin in the car.

I slept into the afternoon. It was a very hot summer day. I discarded the pen and opened a new batch of insulin.

Out of curiosity I tried the heated insulin a couple of days later and it did not work. There wasn't much left but enough to consider it a waste.

Pre Filled Pen Annoyance

My insulin delivery system is a prefilled pen. Basically it is a syringe and vial all in one. All you do is spin this cap(holds the needle) on the top of the pen, expose the needle, dial up the amount of insulin you need, and press down on the plunger.

Sounds like a great idea and it is. The problem comes when you get near the end you cannot dial up anymore even though there is plenty left.

With the vial and syringe you can get almost every single drop out of the vial.

The pen you use up all you can and in order to get the remainder you have to use a syringe to draw out the rest.

So how much insulin is wasted if you just throw away the pen when you cannot dial up anymore insulin? At least 15 units. That is quite a bit. Could be anywhere from 1/2 dose to 2 doses or more depending on the type of insulin and how much you use per dose.

Does it really ruin my day? No. It is just annoying that I have to use more than one tool to take my insulin.

Younger Brother Saves Day

This was a number of years ago. I was at home with my little brother. My parents were off somewhere. I was 17 or 18 and my brother was 15 or 16. I was feeling fine. I had just finished a conversation on the phone with a friend of mine. I walked into the bathroom and the next thing I remember was being on the living room floor with an odd taste in my mouth.

I did not close the bathroom door all the way and my brother saw me standing in front of the mirror staring at myself. My hands were clenched to the sink and I was staring at myself and twitching. He grabbed a hold of me and dragged me to the other room. He popped a couple of glucose tablets into my mouth. Shortly after I became conscious. Glucose tablets probably wasn't the best solution(choking hazard) but he handled the situation admirably. I was embarrassed but thankful.

Most of the time when I am awake I can feel a low blood sugar coming on but this was a situation where I had no idea. This was a time early in my diabetic career but I knew the symptoms they just were not there. Sometimes the way my body feels doesn't match up with my actual glucose number. This is why checking with a meter is so important.

Too Hot

Last year my blood sugar readings were high all the time. It was the beginning of summer and I could not understand why I was so high. I was eating good food and was moving around. I figured my insulin was bad. So I tried a different batch and my blood sugar came down.

I soon realized that I overheated my insulin. I went to a baseball game. My insulin was in my pocket all day long and the sun was beating down on my pants. It got too hot.

It would be nice to know if your insulin has gone bad without continuing to take insulin that does not work.

Disaster Averted

Yesterday morning I took my last drop of insulin. I procrastinated til the last possible minute. I had been out of my long term insulin for over a week. So I had to use much more short term to compensate for the lack of long term. So then I quickly ran out of my short term insulin. I was barely getting by.

My insulin costs me about $300 a month without insurance. I have no insurance and no income.

I had an appointement with my doctor about two months ago and was turned away because I did not have insurance.(I could see him just had to pay $120 on the spot.) I was informed at that time that my doctor goes to a free clinic and sees patients there. So armed with this info I went to this particular clinic and found out that my doctor does not spend time there. I also learned that you can not be given medications unless you see a doctor. The next opening to see a doctor was four weeks away. (Was not going to make it that long.)

So then I went to my regular clinic and told them I had a problem and needed insulin. They were very nice and sent me home with about a months worth of insulin.

Was this situation my fault? Yes of course it was.

Should I have figured this out a couple of weeks ago? Yes.

Why didn't I borrow money from someone? I am tired of borrowing money. I am sure that I could have found someone to help I just did not want to.

I need to get my finances figured out soon because I know that the clinic is willing to help me but I know I will become tired of getting my medications for free. (it is a self esteem issue)

Perhaps I needed an adventure.

Low vs. High

Would you rather have a high blood sugar versus a low blood sugar?

Low blood sugar can be very scary and uncomfortable and you do not want to spend too much time with this condition.

High blood sugar is very uncomfortable. Immediate action, however, is not necessary.

I saw on a blog or forum that a person would rather be high for a few hours vs. low for twenty minutes.(I don't recall where on the internet this was. I should have responded when I saw it.)

Personally, I do not want to feel either condition for an extended period of time. I will do what ever it takes to get out of a low blood sugar as quickly as possible and I will do the same for a high.

Perhaps I am wrong on this but I despise the poor feeling.

Low Reading

The lowest reading that I have recorded, and was still conscious, is 24. I was in high school playing football. We began practice a couple of weeks before school even started. During these initial practices we would have "two a days". (two practices a day, morning and afternoon)

One time after one of these grueling days I came home in the early evening. I was tired. I sat down and just thought about the day. My mom was cooking dinner and it was almost ready. I was not having low blood sugar symptoms I felt fine just a little tired.

Dinner was ready. I checked my blood sugar with my meter. 24! I freaked out. What was worse was my mom freaked out. The strange thing was that I had no symptoms but when I saw the low number then I started to shake and twitch.

The good thing was that I remained conscious the entire time. (I hate losing time)

I have never caught a reading anywhere near that since. 45 - 55 is not an unusual occurence if I feel like I am low.

My Goals

I have a few goals with my web presence. I would like to be able to inform people about diabetes. I want to help people who have been recently diagnosed. I want to make connections. I want to learn new things and refresh on things that I have neglected.

With this blog, the intention is to tell my story and have people with diabetes relate to it.

Phases

Over the years I have had ups and downs. Today I thought about how at different times I either have high enthusiasm about reversing/curing my diabetes or I just go through a routine just to get by.

When I have high enthusiasm I exercise frequently, read excessively, and study my numbers very closely.

Of course, when the excitement is low I am on autopilot.

I think currently I am on the low end of the spectrum but I am feeling an up swing coming on and I am very excited about that.

A Rough Day

In early 2003 I had been exercising a lot and I seemed to be in pretty good condition. The weekend of Memorial day I had run out of my long term insulin and for some reason was not able to get more.

Sunday night I went to the bar and met some people that I went to high school with. (I only had a couple of drinks.) The bar closed and a friend informed me of a party out in the middle of nowhere. There was going to be a bonfire, drinks, and girls. I like all of those. So I went with him.

We got to this place and we had to walk a trail through the woods in complete darkness. After a while we came upon a fire. There were a couple of motor homes and a few chairs around the fire. Nobody was there. There were a few there just sleeping in the motor homes. No beer. No bonfire. No girls. I was very disappointed. The guy that I went with decided to go to bed as well. So I was sitting in front of the small fire all by myself with no way home. I couldn't sleep.

At this point I was not feeling ill. I felt fine just annoyed. I sat there stared at the fire then tried to lay in the dirt to sleep. I could not get comfortable. It seemed like forever but I started to hear the birds chirp. Soon after that the dark woods became lighter and lighter.

I was not going to wait. "I am going to walk home." This campsite was out in the middle of nowhere but my house was in the neighborhood of nowhere so I figured I could walk it. I got up and started walking down the trail soon I came to the road and started the long journey.

My mouth became dry my legs became heavy and I was feeling symptoms of a high blood sugar. I have to pee. Now I have to throw up. I positioned myself in the ditch so no one could see me and I did both at the same time.

All along the way I had stops to urinate and throw up.

I had traveled quite a ways an I realized that I needed to drink some water. I came to a bridge. I looked over the side and there was a stagnant pool of water calling to me. I moved to the edge of the bridge and made the decision not to drink the water and I kept on moving.

A car was coming! I extended my arm and my thumb in hopes that this person would take me home. It wasn't that far traveling by car. As the car drove by the driver motioned that he was going a different way than I was.

Now I am near an acquaintance of mine. It was a short distance from the path I was traveling on. I went to her house and knocked on the door. No response. I knock again. Still no response. All I want is a small drink of water. Nobody was home so I continued on my journey.

Finally I got home. I went to the garden hose. I gulped and gulped and gulped. It felt really good. That good feeling did not last. All that water that went in came rushing back out. I walked into the house grabbed a smaller glass of water and then headed for my bed. I found out later that the walk I took was ten miles long.

Every Memorial day since the mid 1980's I have gone to a service at a church. My uncle died in Vietnam and every memorial day at this church they honor all the people buried at the cemetery who fought in American wars.

This was the first one that I missed.

My parents were at a wedding some distance away from our house and they came home in the early evening on memorial day. I was in bed all day and would occasionally get up to puke. They tried to convince me to go to the hospital and I refused. I did not want to spend a holiday in the hospital.

The next day I was not better so I went to the hospital. I spent three days there. I had lost 20lbs. They got my blood sugar back in control and I felt much better.

I had thought that I was doing well. Exercising and doing alright with concern to my diabetes. It took just a few days without my long term insulin for all of that to unravel.

The Band and Diabetes

For two years the group practiced and wrote new songs. We performed in bars at open mic night. The Mountain Lions International won a Battle of the Bands contest at a local college in February of 2002. As part of our reward we were offered to perform on campus and get paid. Winning that competition gave us confidence to take our show on the road.

In the following six years we had hundreds of performances. In most performances we did everything. Set up and tear down of the equipment. You had to do everything quickly it was very stressful at times. What most people don't understand was that a 4 hour performance was a full day of work. Driving to get to the place hauling equipment in and out. It was at least 8-10 hours worth of work.

If we were on the road we didn't eat well and we drank lots of alcohol. So it was a constant struggle to keep my blood sugar near normal.

I didn't always succeed.

Mountain Lions International

I met a man through my factory work that was interested in music as I was. We became friends and started "jamming" together. November of 1999 was the first practice. Members were from Sierra Leone West Africa, the Philippines and the United States. In early 2000 Mountain Lions International was formed.

This experience would prove to be very enjoyable and also pose difficult problems because of my diabetes.

Back To School

It did not take long to realize that I did not want to work in a factory for the rest of my life. So in the Fall of 2000 I went back to school.

I have always had trouble keeping a regular schedule. (managing my diabetes by the seat of my pants) A regular schedule is important to maintain normal blood sugar.

So I would go to school in the morning come home in the afternoon sleep for about four hours in the early evening and be at work for an 8 hour shift starting at 10pm. I only did that for about a month. That would have killed me if I kept that up for very long.

It was a two year school that I was attending. I commuted. One hour worth of driving everyday.

Entering The Workforce

I finished a year of college and dropped out halfway through the next semester. I had failed and I fell into a deep depression because of it. A friend of mine had gotten a job through an employment agency so I figured I could do the same thing. So in April of 1999 I got my first assignment. The job was not too physically taxing but I was working third shift and it messed my schedule up. I was having many low blood sugars. When they became too intense I asked to be moved to a new location and a different shift.

I was now working second shift. I still had problems. One night driving home from work. I could not figure out where my home was. I felt a low blood sugar coming on and grabbed a candybar before I left but it did not help. I drove around the block a few times and barely made it home.

It was a rough time in my life but at least I had some money.

The Evolution of Insulin

There have been many changes in types of insulin and delivery systems. I have had four different combinations of insulin and two different options of delivery. First it was Regular insulin combined with NPH. NPH lasted longer than the regular and had an extra substance in it. You had to gently roll the vial to mix the solution before you injected it. You could mix the two insulins together in one shot. It lasted maybe half a day.

After that was regular insulin and something called lente. Then came humalog and lantus. Now I take novalog and lantus. Each change came with longer lasting long term and quicker acting shorter lasting short term.

In the beginning everything was delivered with a syringe. Now both my insulins can be taken with a pre filled cartridge or "pen". I keep one as a pen and the other with syringe. Over the years I stock piled on syringes so I figured it was a good idea to keep that option open.

I haven't thought too seriously about the pump.

I expect the type of insulin I take and the way I take it will change again and again as time goes by. I would also expect longer lasting insulin. In fact I saw somewhere that longer insulin is already being talked about.

Had An Incident The Other Day

I got home late Friday evening. I felt my blood sugar was high so I took a dose of insulin. I needed to be up early in the morning because I was going to an event where I would be physically active all day. So I was awaken before the alarm I was sweating profusely and was feeling strange. Because I was semi conscious I decided to fight the low blood sugar. I fell back asleep. The alarm went off at 7:30. I got up and was still low. Was able to get sugar in me without further incident. I made it through the rest of the day and had a good time.



This was a mistake I could have had my day ruined. Even after 15 years of experience I still make mistakes. I should have gotten up immediately. I got lucky.

Near Death Experience

After my first semester at college I came home and met up with my high school friends. Went to a party on New Years Eve and got very drunk. I did some things that I may never live down. I had a hangover that lasted nearly a week.

This experience should have told me to be careful with alcohol. It did not.

My school had a winter semester. It was one month long. The college that I went to was about five miles out of town and in the middle of a corn field. You drive by a bunch of farms and then there is a college surrounded by cornfields. One friday it snowed and classes were cancelled for the day. I lived on campus but there was enough commuters to cancell the classes.

So to celebrate a friend and I got a bottle of liquor. We drank it one shot glass at a time. We didn't quite finish the bottle but we were pretty close. Then we went to a fraternity house to drink more. After that I don't remember. I was taken back to my room. I woke up with my sheets and clothing covered in vomit.

I stayed in my room the rest of the weekend. I couldn't eat. I would drink a little water and then puke it up into a bucket. I remember walking to the bathroom to urinate which was maybe 20 paces away from my room. I put my hand on the wall and I could feel my own heartbeat and I was having trouble breathing.

Monday I didn't go to class. My roommate came back from class saw that I didn't go and that I wasn't getting any better. He took me to the nurse. It was just a short walk from our room to where the nurse was but I needed all the help I could get from him to get there. Soon after I was inspected by the nurse I was taken to the emergency room via ambulance.

I spent five days in the hospital. It turned out that even though I was throwing up everything that I put into my mouth. My blood sugar was still high. My blood sugar reading was 1200. By the way a norml reading is between 80 and 120. My pulse rate was 200. And my blood pressure was extremely low. I went to the nurse without a minute to spare.

Missing a week of class during the winter term was equal to missing a month in a regular semester. I did a couple of things to make it up and I think the professor took it easy on me. He gave me a D in the class.

I had bad heartburn for at least a month after the experience. Swallowing was extremely painful.

This experience definitely should have told me to be more careful with alcohol. It did not.

The College Years

I graduated high school in June of 1997 and I was glad the worst years of my life were finally over. I went to a private college in Sheboygan WI. This was the first time on my own. The first few months I shined. I was doing well in my classes and my blood sugar was under control.

So for three months I did very well. My major was computer science so I got a job working in the computer lab.

In 1998 I didn't do very well I learned how to party. I gained more friends and I joined a fraternity. So I spent most of my time drinking versus studying. I passed my classes but just barely.

Wisdom Teeth Removal

I needed to have my wisdom teeth removed.(I am still as wise as I ever was) They were impacted and the way that they were coming in threatened the work that was done to straighten my teeth four years prior.

Normally when someone has their wisdom teeth removed they go to the dentist office and he or she puts you under with gas and you go home shortly after the procedure is done.

Well not for me. I went to the hospital they wanted to monitor me more closely to make sure my sugar level was just right.

And I wasn't allowed to go home until I was able to eat something. When surgery was finished and I became conscious again they put food in front of me. I really wanted to go home. With all my might I force the food into my mouth and swallowed as much as I could. I remember the nurse coming by to check on my progress and I was hoping that I had done just enough to go home. "You have to finish everything on your tray."

Shortly after that everything that went in came back up. I definitely was not going home. They kept me over night.

I was given injections to combat the nausea and bouts of pain. My blood sugar was also checked on a regular basis.

The next day I was able to eat a little more and they let me go home.

It is very difficult situation if you have diabetes and are not able to eat.

Check Blood Sugar

In the beginning checking blood sugar was very interesting. I checked every chance I got and wrote it down in a book. As time went by it became less interesting. Maybe I would check, but I wouldn't write it down. Now fifteen years into it if I don't have testing strips it's not a big deal. It should be a big deal and I need to change my attitute about this.

A New Hobby

I needed somehting to keep my mind off troubling things. I "played" the alto saxaphone all through school but I had little interest for the instrument. What happened was me and a couple of friends witnessed a "show" where kids our age were putting on a performance. It was punk rock music. So friends of mine that were in the school band decided to become a rock band. We had to get new instruments. It would be very difficult to play rock music with a couple of saxaphones and a trombone.

My new instrument was the bass guitar. Because of my recent struggles it wasn't difficult to convince my parents that this is what I needed in my life.

So August of 1996 i began playing the bass guitar.

The Great Weight Gain

I had lost 25 lbs the summer of 1995. I was not very big to begin with I went from 150 - 125. I was involved in sports football, wrestling, and baseball. Keeping weight in wrestling was always something difficult to do. So I was happy when the coach told me not to worry about my weight. Where ever I was at was where I was at.

The doctors put me on a 3000+ calorie diet to gain back the weight that I had lost. I would eat a meal and after the meal I would drink a shake. Perhaps I was on this diet for a little too long. I was eating more food than ever and I also put myself on a muscle training program.

September of 1995 I weighed 125: September of 1996 I weighed 185. 60lbs in one year. It was a definite help for the football season. And it was the most I ever weighed in my life.

Acceptance Difficulties

The first few months on insulin I was able to keep my blood sugar under control. During those months I was also lashing out. I envied the people who had diabetes earlier in their lives. I had sixteen years as a non diabetic and I had trouble coping with this new reality. I got into trouble at school and was having difficulty dealing with my parents. I wanted to go out and do different things and they (especially my mom) wasn't allowing me for fear I would have blood sugar problems. The first year as a diabetic was difficult for me. I had the regular teenage angst along with problems coping with my diabetes.

I'm glad that time has long since past.

The first day

I remember the doctor telling me that I have diabetes. I was confused. I really didn't know what diabetes was and I figured it was a really bad thing.

I remembered a student in my elementary class who had diabetes. She always had snacks in the afternoon sitting at her desk. And I always wondered why she was allowed a snack and no one else was. That was the only experience I had with diabetes.

I had just got my drivers license and my mother and younger brother were with me at the doctor's office. I drove home and I remember traveling on the rural road that we lived on pushing 70 MPH. I pulled into the drive way parked the car threw mysef to the dirt and had a crying fit. After a few minutes writhing on the ground my hand grasped a piece of metal and I jumped to my feet and threw it at the wooden wall of the shed. The metal piece stuck into the wall like a throwing knife. It remained there for many years.

Misdiagnosis

When I first started this posting I figured I would write in chronological order. I got to thinking about how I was misdiagnosed and was curious how common this is.

In June of 1995 I had no symptoms. I was going to the doctor for a sports physical for school. They found sugar in my urine and shortly after that the doctor diagnosed me as a type 2 diabetic. I was prescribed pills and they didn't work because I'm a type 1 diabetic.

So I will pose a question. How many people with diabetes were originally diagnosed as the wrong type?

The Beginning of My Life With Diabetes

I was diagnosed a diabetic in June of 1995, unfortunately for me I was diagnosed as a Type 2 diabetic. That is unfortunate because I'm a Type 1. The doctor made a serious mistake. She made it sound like she didn't want me to take shots but I think she was pushing a pill.



Anyway the summer of 1995 was not very fun. I lost 25 pounds and was getting more and more sick. The pills obviously were not working.



One of the main symptoms of high blood sugar is frequent urination. One instance I went to the movie theater. I went to the bathroom before I left my house and barely made it to the bathroom at the movie theater.(a 30 minute drive) Then I had to go again during the movie.



The most disturbing time I was playing right field and there was no bathroom near by. I just let it go and hoped the ball wasn't hit to me. Now you're probably thinking "oh big deal kids pee their pants all the time. And on the baseball field." I was 16 years old this particular occasion. Luckily I didn't get teased I think I was the only one that knew.



At the end of the summer I showed up for football practice 25 pounds lighter than the year before. I was extremely weak and barely made it through the first day. The next day I went to the hospital. They gave me insulin and I instantly felt better. I spent 5 days in the hospital where they taught me to take insulin by myself and kept watch on me to figure the correct dosage. They also taught me the symptoms of both low and high blood sugar.



That was the beginning of my life with diabetes. Cure diabetes now.